Devilzsoup Dance

I moved!

2010-09-25T23:05:00.001-07:00

You can now find my random musings (about dance and pretty much everything else) over here:

www.devilzsoup.tumblr.com

See you all there ;)

xxx

Planning only helps so much...

2010-09-01T16:39:00.000-07:00

There are some things people don't know about me...

1. I'm a lot more of an attention whore than I appear.

2. Sometimes I do child-like things (like jumping in puddles) just because it's fun... there isn't any form of subtext in it.

3. I'm a lot more insecure and gullible than people realise: I gave up auditioning at 23 because my principal dance teacher told me I wasn't good enough. After 3 years of her telling me this I believed her: I shouldn't have.

4. I make a lot of plans... and rarely act on them.

Well ok a brief glance at this blog and you would've realised this last one so that's not so unknown!

Ok back to the point: #3 bugs me. And has done for a while. I am a good dancer but because I'm short and not as flexible as my younger competition I was told to give up... and I listened to her.

There's realism and there's plain bitchiness.

Obviously I'm never going to be a Rockette (too short), I will never be a prima ballerina (too turned in) and cruise ships are out of the question (I get seasick)... but that doesn't mean I can't dance!

Today I wrote my 'to-do' list for my newly updated life plan that I'm actually happy with, I printed up business cards and updated my Danceplug profile. Later tonight I'm going into the studio to record some more choreo and post it on youtube...

Everything is set for the green light... all I need now is the OK to stay in Canada and I'm ready to go!

I hearby swear to never let someone else's negativity stop me from persuing my dreams.

Nu-uh, I'm a good dancer... and I intend to do everything in my power to prove that.

;)

Make a Wish!

2010-08-31T23:11:00.001-07:00

It's 11.11!!

Yes I posted twice in the same day... this is more of an update really.

I've done some research and I've found a neat little hostel like place in Richmond where you get your own room and everything that I can stay in for $35 a night. Cheaper than a hotel and far cheaper than renting a studio apt just for 2 nights a week!

Now I just need to get my residency approved, buy me a nice reliable vehicle and get me some work over there!

I'm going to start a double life: teacher in small town Van Island/choreographer in Van city!

Awesomesauce ;)

xxx

Choices

2010-08-31T16:14:00.001-07:00

Again: I've no idea where I got this from... but it works :)

Ah the life of a dancer...

Don't get me wrong, I love my job. Teaching is amazing and there's nothing like getting to know the kids and seeing them grow year after year and the feeling of being a part of the community.

But then I watch SYTYCDC and read other dancers' tweets, etc and the only thing that goes through my mind is: God I wish I hadn't given that up. And I wouldn't have done if I hadn't lost faith in myself entirely... (and yes thanks, mean principal teacher at my dance school that was mostly your fault)

I've always been into choreography. I've got a lot to learn for sure but I have so many ideas that would be amazing on professional dancers and don't translate well on student dancers (not that they don't try or look good) but you know how it is...

*Le sigh.

I'm trying to figure out time to do both... buy a house here and teach mon - thurs then rent a flat/room in a house in van and dance/choreograph there at the weekends.

(Side note: of course doing this would effectively mean I couldn't buy the studio BUT I can do that when I'm older with more experience right?)

Granted I'd have NO time left to myself but I'd be ridiculously happy.

Okay...

...Let's get on this.

Big Decisions

2010-08-24T23:57:00.001-07:00

So I've been 'umming and ahhing' for a while now about the best way to solve my studio's big current problem: lack of student registrations.

And I think my best bet is to bite the bullet and try to buy the studio.

That's right I'm going to buy a studio.

A studio.

At 26.

To say that I'm scared is an understatement... I've only been teaching 6 years (3 not including college training!) and the only business knowledge I have is whatever I can find on Google and my own common sense.

BUT I have a lot of the latter and although I am young I've got a lot of helpful friends full of advice.

Now I just have to a) successfully get permanent residency in Canada (it's been sent off now comes the nervous waiting part) b) get my business plan and finances sorted and most importantly: c) persuade my boss and her parents to sell me the place.

The last part could be the trickiest... others have tried to buy it before to no avail. I'm hoping that given the situation we're in that we can figure something out. I love this little studio and I do NOT want to see it die. My boss has the wisdom and experience and I have the dedication and innovation... hopefully we can put our skills together to make PCSDance the studio of the future!

***Watch this space***

;)

Vlogs!

2010-08-10T14:17:00.000-07:00

So I'm a big youtube fan now... I've been busy uploading all sorts of choreography videos and now I'm branching into vlogs/tutorials.

Here are a few of the ideas I've had:

* Audition/Stage Make Up

* Competition Hairstyles

* Dancewear reviews

* Make up/hair product reviews (for stage)

* Choreography tips

* Home work outs/stretching routines

Anyone got any more ideas? I figured there are loads of regular every day tutorials but few (if any) dance related ones! So if there's anything you guys want me to do a vlog on? Comment/tweet me!

http://www.youtube.com/user/devilzsoup

p.s. What do you think of my showreel? Pretty funky huh? hehe not bad for a teensy camera and windows movie maker ;)

Immigration Story

2010-08-10T00:25:00.000-07:00

There are a lot of things in the media right now about immigration issues in the States... ok I live in Canada but it's a very similar situation here and let's face it the US leads the way in a lot of things nowadays whether we like it or not.

I in no way condone the illegal immigrants currently ruining it for those of us trying to emigrate legally but let me tell you my story so you can understand just how hard it is...

I moved to Canada 3 years ago with a great resume, fantastic education and no history of anything remotely worrying. I'd never been in hospital, I had a good credit rating and the most I'd seen of anything to do with a policeman was some drunk student guy dressed up on halloween.

I was reluctantly given a 6 month visa at the border and allowed in.

3 years, 4 work permit applications and 3 jobs later I'm still just a temporary worker desperately trying to apply for residency so I can stay and continue contributing to Canadian Society.

I've been screwed over by rental companies, phone companies and even my employer... why? Because I'm an immigrant. Because immigrants have no rights.

I am stuck in a situation now where I'm having to survive off the kindness of friends and family to put food in my stomach: my employer underpaid me by $5000. I can't claim EI, I can't go on welfare, I can't get any other job than the dance studio and I can't fight my employers for what they owe me because I need the job to stay in the country.

If it wasn't for my truly amazing friends I would have no choice but to work illegally and get paid under the table in order to keep a roof over my head.

To put it simply: I've been working legally and paying my taxes every year like a good canadian citizen. I've not gotten into any trouble, I do a job that there is a high demand for and not enough well trained people to fill that demand... yet because of those horrible people who have to ruin it for everyone else (illegal immigrants) I am stuck in a situation with no income and no guarantee that when I finally have the money to pay for my residency application fee that I'll even be given residency.

THAT is the sad truth about immigration. Yes there are a LOT of stupid bastards out there (excuse my french) who screw the system but there are also a lot of honest immigrants out there who desperately want to be legal permanent citizens and contribute to this wonderful country... but can't because of government bureaucracy and have no rights against people that treat them unfairly.

I wish there was something I could do about it.

Keeping Busy

2010-07-30T12:43:00.000-07:00

I believe I got this image from www.ilovelolliblog.com?

If anyone knows please let me know in the comments!

Moving, immigration, working... and I thought I was going to be bored this summer!

Things are really hectic with all that but I'm still finding time to work out and nail some awesome choreography for next year.

Dance camp is only 2 weeks away and we only have 2 levels but I'm excited anyway! I've missed teaching and all my students, they can be super stressful but they don't half make you smile.

As for immigration... HOLY MOLY! It's so tricky and confusing but I'm finally done filling out all the forms and finding all my 'evidence'. It's surprisingly difficult to prove you're not a) a terrorist b) crazy or c) a lazy benefit stealing bum.

I love being busy but it's important to take time to breathe inbetween the chaos.

...and breathe...

Feeling Antsy

2010-07-14T22:37:00.000-07:00

You know those days when you just can't make any decisions?

I've been having a few of those lately.

Hence the lack of posts!

Oh well, gotta take the bad days with the good I suppose!

Exciting things happening soon... I'll update when I've got confirmation! ;)

Taking it one step at a time

2010-07-06T13:44:00.001-07:00

Maybe it's because I'm an artist and we're prone to episodes of self-doubt... but we all have those times in our lives where we question what we're doing, where we are, who we are...

Tonight is one such episode.

I'm not looking for sympathy and I'm not making excuses but let me explain something:

I'm following my dream. I gave up my home, my family and friends and everything I knew to move to a new country to follow that dream.

I haven't been home or seen any of my family (except for one awesome visit from my mum about 18 months ago) in almost 3 years, I'm struggling to make ends meet, fighting tooth and nail to keep and excel in every job I'm lucky enough to get and I've lost two very important people to me within the last 9 months which I've barely begun to deal with emotionally.

As for relationships? I just don't have the spare time or energy to put into them which ultimately leaves me with bad experiences I'd like to forget and ruins the few good opportunities that I do find.

(It's like trying to find a nice scented candle: you can't afford the time or money to find a good quality one so you take your chances at the dollar store. Most of the time they smell dreadful or are full of toxins but very occasionally you find one that's good... only downside is it doesn't last because you didn't put the effort in to find one that would.)

But it's really not that bad!

I get paid to do a job I absolutely adore. I get to work with people who make me smile every single day (even when they're being little bastards) and I can be creative. It's never a problem to express myself, I'm fit and healthy (albeit with a terrible diet but that's self imposed lol) and although I miss my friends and family back in the UK (and in Alberta where I first lived when I moved to Canada) I still get to talk to them all the time. I've also made some good new friends here who I suspect will be just as miss-able as all the others when I move again next year.

I guess what I'm trying to say here is that following your dream is like this:

Everyone tells you how hard it is, you know it's going to suck but it's ok because the end result is totally worth it. The thing is you have absolutely no idea just HOW hard it's going to be until you actually get there and experience it... you still know it's going to be worth it in the end but that doesn't help you deal with just how sucky it really is. So you do your best to ignore the sucky times, clinging to the notion that when it's all over you'll be SO glad that you kept going and never gave up.

Still if instead of everyone saying "well we told you so, quit bitching" it'd be nice for a couple of people to say "we believe in you, don't give up"...

***

Following your dream is a dangerous and courageous thing to do. Few of us do it and even fewer of us actually succeed but nobody can do it without enough support.

So if you know someone who's following their dream: take a moment every now and then to give them a hug or some encouraging words. They might not show it but they definitely need it.

And if you're the one following? Don't be afraid to ask for a hug when you need one. At least one person you know would drop everything to do it if they only knew how badly you needed it.

xxx

Choreographically Speaking

2010-06-29T22:59:00.000-07:00

It's funny how sometimes you start off with such a definite idea of what your dance is going to be about and what it'll look like... then find it all completely change halfway through.

This dance started off being about a girl being hesitant about giving her heart to someone new after only just putting it back together (oddly enough, close to reality there... well you know what they say about life imitating art right?!) then halfway through it changed to being a girl sitting in a hospital waiting room, waiting to see if her loved one pulls through and I think it looks a lot better with that idea behind it.

I also think this idea applies to life: sometimes we have set ideas about what we're going to do with our lives and what it's all about then it can suddenly change without any reason or warning. And even if it doesn't seem so at first? It's usually for the better.

Emotional Fat Day

2010-06-27T16:31:00.000-07:00

Ok I'll keep this brief because I hate whining about things but... you know those days when you feel totally... blah?

Yeah it's an emotional fat day.

When the entire world seems to be telling you to give up, go home, nobody really thought you could do it anyway and no matter what you do to try and cheer yourself up you still just feel so...

blah!

Now as a true Brit we are raised to bottle up any and all feelings and push them deep down inside you so you can carry on with the job in hand. The only downside to this of course is that:

a) everyone thinks you're a lot stronger than you are and piles on the pressure accordingly

b) you come across as a cold feeling-less bitch until

c) eventually those repressed feelings explode causing you to come across as a cold feeling-less crazy bitch.

You would've thought after 26 years I would've come up with a better way to deal with the bad things that happen in my life but alas I have not. One day I'll figure it out but for now I'm gonna allow myself the occasional pity party and dance it out.

How do you cope with your emotional fat days?!

Dance Plug

2010-06-25T13:44:00.000-07:00

http://www.danceplug.com/

Have you heard of this place yet? It's clearly still early days but it seems like such a useful site! I might even consider signing up and paying for it at some point (but then again I am such a cheapskate right now!)

And yes I applied for the Harold & Kumar 3D audition even though I'm 2" too short... the guy choreographing it might like me for something else! You never know ;)

The To Do List

2010-06-21T19:31:00.000-07:00

You know how I said one of the things I wanted to do over summer was choreograph and film it?

It's a work in progress (and I could pick it apart technically until the cows come home!) but I'm thinking I might use it as a small group number... incorporate some flowers in there and some funky lifts. Could be cool!

Some other ideas I've had for choreo are:

* Large group lyrical dance to 21 Guns - Greenday/Cast of American Idiot

* Small tap group dance to When the Night Feels my Song - Bedouin Soundclash (about travellers waiting for the next train after missing it... sounds odd but I can see it in my head!)

* Medium jazz group number to Black & Gold - Sam Sparro (Fosse stylee!)

I'm still working on some hip hop routines but nothing solid idea-wise just yet!

Maybe my trip to Harbour Dance in Vancouver will give me some more ideas.

Summer's here!

2010-06-21T18:40:00.000-07:00

So it's the first day of summer...

As a teacher I've officially entered into that scary realm of 'nothing to do' for the next 3 months. Every year I get nervous around May as I realise my work and my paycheck suddenly cuts off until september and I try to figure out what to fill my days with.

Luckily the studio I'm at this year is doing a couple of performances and a week long summer camp to keep me busy for some of the time and I've got a part time job to tide me over but what to do with the rest of my days that can help my dancing?

Here's a few ideas I had:

* Working out and stretching every day (kind of a no brainer but when you're on holiday it's easy to let it slide sometimes!)

* Choreographing and video taping my dances.

* Researching auditions and conventions/intensives to check out in the fall.

*Designing and making my own dance wear (otherwise known as: customising T shirts!)

* Getting new resume photos taken.

* Checking out new classes and dance styles.

Obviously in times like these with no steady income over the summer money is an issue but most of those ideas are relatively free (as long as you have a camera!)

As you can see from the pic above... I've already been playing around with new resume photos! hehe

What do you do over summer when you're not dancing?

Charity Weekend

2010-06-19T11:22:00.000-07:00

Sorry I don't know where this pic came from but it's one of my faves!

SO I took part in Relay for Life yesterday... for a little while at least.

It was fun but after the silent lap with the bagpipers? I just had to call it a night and head home... not least because I had to work today at 10!

It felt good to do something for a cause though and I saw so many of my students there! Our 'rival' studio did a routine at the opening ceremony too which I thought was cute (also kept thinking: why didn't WE have a routine in this?) and one of my senior girls can REALLY sing which I never knew!

But we are taking part in some community events soon...

Tuesday June 22nd at 1.30 - Unity Church, Port Alberni (for people who can't leave their houses without help)

Thursday July 1st (CANADA DAY!!) - Glenwood Centre, Port Alberni (for Canada Day celebrations of course)

I'm kinda excited. I love being part of the community and I thought it was strange that we seemed to hardly do that as a studio: I'm happy that we are now. I do love organising things!

Speaking of charity and organising I'm still hoping to organise a small local dance competition to raise money for Eating Disorders. So far I've got most of it figured out but I need to find out about permits, charity bank accounts, etc... I also need to grow a backbone and ask my boss at my studio if I'm ok to do this on the side when I'm not teaching. Obviously I'll try my hardest not to let it take time away from my teaching but knowing me it'll blow up into something a lot bigger than I intended!!

Still... sounds like fun and I really want to do it... I even have a name: Star Focus. What do you think?

'Til Tuesday peeps!

SYTYCD7

2010-06-16T21:17:00.001-07:00

So I know some of you watched tonights episode... what did you think?

I love Lauren, she's so cute and punchy... aaand ok I kinda like her because she's little. Having said that I see what the judges were saying... they're all amazing but just not quite killing it just yet.

At least not killing it to the level I'd expect.

Sonya Tayeh is still my absolute favourite choreographer... Mia Michaels and Mandy Moore are a close second but Sonya's choreo just really clicks for me.

What did you think?

Twitter Obsessed

2010-06-15T23:33:00.000-07:00

Ok I admit it... I love Twitter.

More than Facebook.

Way more than Myspace.

...

Possibly more than chocolate... ok that's not true but I do love Twitter!

It makes me feel that much closer to my dance idols and actually causes me to get excited if any of them happen to @ reply me... of course I'm aware it's probably not them but some poor lowly assistant replying to my tweets but in that small moment I feel like I actually have contact with these top flight dancers and choreographers and I am totally in awe!

Now you could wonder why I'd be in awe of people who I aspire to one day join? Well truth is my confidence level isn't always that high. In fact I used to be painfully shy... still can be on occasion.

Even though I'm aware that I am just as good as many other dancers out there and I have 'something special' in my dancing and choreography I never quite believe it. Sometimes this is suitably humbling and sometimes it just gets into my way... for example: I was one of the many backing dancers in Michael Buble's music video for "Haven't met you yet". I spent a cold rainy august night waiting to do the 32 counts of super easy choreo with at least a hundred other dancers and actually spoke to Michael at one point and what do you think was the scariest moment for me? Walking into the room to sign in... I swear I almost turned around and gave up!

Crazy as it sounds I was more scared of those other dancers laughing at me having the audacity to be among them than the fact that I practically elbowed Michael flipping Buble into a window then said 'oh s*** sorry dude'...

Insane right?! Similar thing on twitter... I get starstruck meeting dancers hardly anyone has heard of yet meeting actual celebrities doesn't bother me! :D

So follow me on Twitter.... @devilzsoup or you could follow my current studio... @pcsdance

You can check me out on Myspace and Facebook too...

http://www.myspace.com/elliebadham

http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#!/ellie.badham?ref=ts

(If the last one doesn't work just hunt me down... I'm the one with the hat... I'll explain why I have two later!)

Sup!

2010-06-15T23:09:00.000-07:00

Ok so let me tell you a little back story...

Once upon a time there was a girl who was convinced she wanted to be a film director... 2 years and an entire qualification later she realised this was BS and went back to her true love: Dance.

She auditioned, she trained, she graduated and then she up and moved to Canada to pursue her dream career in dance.

Now she's a teacher in a tiny place called Port Alberni and she loves it... but it's not enough. She wants to teach, dance, choreograph AND DJ (for some unknown reason, she's still figuring that out)... SO she figured whilst she had a year of solid income to rely on she'd work on her skills and get her choreography out there so when she moved to Vancouver she could broaden her dance horizons.

*This is where I stop talking in the third person!*

This is where this blog comes in... this is where I'm going to post any and all of my dance adventures. From new songs I love to teaching stories, from random improvised dance videos to the latest episode of SYTYCD, from auditions I attend to shows I see... if it's dance, it goes here!

Oh and I'm looking into starting a dance festival and possible dance company at some point... so yeah.... watch out for those ;)

See you soon peeps!